The Cinema Experience

Right then. This has been coming for some time, but I can delay no longer. What the ‘hell’ is going on in multiplex cinemas these days?!

Let me set out my stall on this one… I’m a film lover. I think that’s obvious. In fact it’s my love of film that saw me end up working as an assistant manager for the UK’s leading cinema chain for 18 months several years ago. This cinema was one of the few that regularly hosted UK film premiers outside of the West End and is the ‘local’ cinema for many well known London based actors, directors and producers, a cinema with a reputation for quality service and viewing experience. So perhaps I have a certain view on this.

Now perhaps I’m being unreasonable, or just over expectant, but I would have hoped that at least ‘some’ of the senior management in cinemas these days might actually give a damn about what their customer’s experience. There are a lot of things to care about, but these are all elements that should surely be standard and not limited to the few big name or elite locations. Fundamentally, there is one thing that accounts for a great cinema experience; eye for detail, specifically eye for detail in customer service and presentation quality.

Customer Service
The first thing that pisses me off is not being able to see what’s playing at what time. This is more noticeably a recent problem with the migration to automated notice boards that are on the back of the box office walls, this is a problem if you don’t know what’s on, particularly when you’re stuck at the back of the queue. The most annoying part of this is that even if you can read the display the rotation of the films and times is such that you either have to wait forever to find what you’re after, or the rotation is too fast and you don’t have a time to find the start times!! Here’s an idea… show the bloody lot on one board at the same time!! And show them so I can read them whilst in the queue.

This way of advertising times creates 2 customer service issues: you either have to leave the queue to find the showing times or you could leave your decision until you get to the front of the line. Option 1 allows the queue time to grow further, something which might cause further issues later, whilst option 2 (the seemingly frequent selection for the thoughtless masses) slows the progress of the queue while decisions are made. All this takes up time and causes annoyance for those that otherwise showed up with what would normally be considered ‘enough’ time and starts the whole experience poorly.

“You could look up the times in advance”, I hear you say. Yes, I could, and frequently do, but there are many occasions for which my choice of film will be decided by the time at which I arrive at the cinema, especially if my trip into town has had other purpose. So this argument does fall down.

Now the queue; I expect to queue for popular releases, especially on opening weekends, which is why I usually show up early, if not just to get a good seat (see my guide to the perfect cinema seat – if you’re as sad as I am!), but knowing there is a new big release and still only offering one box office assistant is ridiculous. Sort your shit out!! If you want the admissions to make budget, make sure that you can sell tickets in time for customers to get seated with the house light on!! Additional time queuing for tickets might mean that customers are less likely to buy food and drink, and unless things have massively changed since my time, this is where cinemas rake it in, because of the mark up.

So surely, multiplex managers, this first point of contact with your customers is important? So why can’t you get this right? Especially if your name has ‘deluxe’ in it! Not a very deluxe experience.

Cinema customer service shouldn’t just finish in the snack bar either. The bigger the film, the wider the audience and the more likelihood for disruption, so why, when cinemas are legally bound to have staff in attendance for fire regulations, do management not oblige those same staff to periodically attend the auditoria and ensure people aren’t pissing about and disturbing other customers?!

Presentation Quality
Were staff employed in the above fashion more frequently they could be also monitoring the quality of the screening. I don’t see why I should have to leave my seat and miss some of the film just to track down a staff member to tell them the picture is out of focus!

Getting the aspect ratio or scope of the picture right at the start of the film is yet another seemingly regular incredulity that crops up. Having paid the ever increasing admissions I don’t expect to have to watch the start of the film missing the tops of peoples heads!! Again if someone were present this would be spotted and I wouldn’t have to miss the start of the film. Bastards! It shits me no end when I do find a staff member only to receive a vacant look lacking all understanding of what the issue is.

These things crop up all too often and perhaps for those in attendance a little less regularly they would all go unnoticed, but this is too frequent for me not to vent about.

The cinema should be a place of escapism and enjoyment. I wish it was always so.
TC