After last nights effort I’m doubtful anyone in Derby has ever heard of Cinema Etiquette! "‘Cinema Etiquette?’ sound’s like it has subtitles, no thanks!"
Preview weekends = NO ADS & TRAILERS (Remember this for next time!)
PEOPLE! Arrive on time! Don’t show up after the film starts and then expect others will be happy with you tripping and shuffling around in the dark in front of them. And don’t then proceed to rustle around every single piece of food wrapping you can find whilst you get settled. And when the rest of the row is empty, at least leave one seat space. I don’t know you, you’re likely to talk (if your entrance is anything to go by), and I sat here because I wanted space and most dicks like you usually sit at the back, where I can tolerate you. And don’t ask what you’ve missed, the person you came in with also missed it. And certainly don’t ask me, I missed it too, you shit! So how the hell should I know?!
AND PEOPLE! Once you’re settled, concentrate. For Christ’s sake concentrate!
Clearly you don’t understand how pissing annoying it is to hear the constant murmur (if only it was just a murmur!) next to you asking ‘what did she say?’, ‘what was that?’ or the perennial ‘is that the guy from the start?’ These questions are annoying to hear in themselves, but the answers can be just as fist-clenchingly frustrating. I don’t need a commentary. I WAS WATCHING AND LISTENING! And I certainly don’t need to hear your commentary because you clearly have no idea either!
And people, when you’re asked to ‘be quiet’, in my most constrained and polite tone, why do you seem to hear one of two things:
‘finish this sentence now, but I’m OK with you continuing to talk throughout the remainder of the film’
OR
‘I just shot your cat in the head, shagged the carcass and left the remnants in your popcorn bucket’.
The former seems to result in the perpetrator maintaining complete ignorance that there is a problem; the latter appears to suggest that I’m the inconsiderate twat that is making this cinematic experience less than the intended enjoyable one.
I paid good money to see this film, money I worked for, and you don’t give a shit, just as surely as I don’t give a shit about your financial situation. But this is the thing, YOU paid money for this too, and clearly haven’t taken in a single bit of it, apart from the fight scenes, explosions and the shiny shiny lights! Surely this has been a waste of your money?
It's more than just bad films that should die at the box office!
C’mon cine folk, show some respect! Then we can all enjoy the film.
Preview weekends = NO ADS & TRAILERS (Remember this for next time!)
PEOPLE! Arrive on time! Don’t show up after the film starts and then expect others will be happy with you tripping and shuffling around in the dark in front of them. And don’t then proceed to rustle around every single piece of food wrapping you can find whilst you get settled. And when the rest of the row is empty, at least leave one seat space. I don’t know you, you’re likely to talk (if your entrance is anything to go by), and I sat here because I wanted space and most dicks like you usually sit at the back, where I can tolerate you. And don’t ask what you’ve missed, the person you came in with also missed it. And certainly don’t ask me, I missed it too, you shit! So how the hell should I know?!
AND PEOPLE! Once you’re settled, concentrate. For Christ’s sake concentrate!
Clearly you don’t understand how pissing annoying it is to hear the constant murmur (if only it was just a murmur!) next to you asking ‘what did she say?’, ‘what was that?’ or the perennial ‘is that the guy from the start?’ These questions are annoying to hear in themselves, but the answers can be just as fist-clenchingly frustrating. I don’t need a commentary. I WAS WATCHING AND LISTENING! And I certainly don’t need to hear your commentary because you clearly have no idea either!
And people, when you’re asked to ‘be quiet’, in my most constrained and polite tone, why do you seem to hear one of two things:
‘finish this sentence now, but I’m OK with you continuing to talk throughout the remainder of the film’
OR
‘I just shot your cat in the head, shagged the carcass and left the remnants in your popcorn bucket’.
The former seems to result in the perpetrator maintaining complete ignorance that there is a problem; the latter appears to suggest that I’m the inconsiderate twat that is making this cinematic experience less than the intended enjoyable one.
I paid good money to see this film, money I worked for, and you don’t give a shit, just as surely as I don’t give a shit about your financial situation. But this is the thing, YOU paid money for this too, and clearly haven’t taken in a single bit of it, apart from the fight scenes, explosions and the shiny shiny lights! Surely this has been a waste of your money?
It's more than just bad films that should die at the box office!
C’mon cine folk, show some respect! Then we can all enjoy the film.
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